“Karma, My Cajun Heritage, and the Chip Confession”

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So, it must be a gift left to me from my Cajun heritage or something that I can eat just about anywhere; be it in a chair, at a table, on a bed, standing up, in the car, and am fine with it.

Harold, on the other hand NEEDS a table. We (“I”) always have a laugh when we are not at the table, as he struggles to get everything together without spilling food on himself, the couch, the floor, etc. He tolerates it, but it frustrates him to no end. By now, it’s just the joke of all jokes between us.

Last night, after a long day at work, we ended up eating some awesome sandwiches and chips in our hotel bed. So, we’re talking about the day and enjoying our food, when all of a sudden Harold’s bag of chips “leaked” a whole bunch of itty bitty chip crumbs on his side of the sheets.

Harold (like this was the first time it ever happened) gets totally frustrated at the sight of this mess on his side of the bed. But then, lo and behold, he just keeps eating! It’s hysterical to me that he just accepts it this time and keeps eating with that mess on his side of the bed (knowing that he is going to have to lie down in that later LOL). He MUST have been super tired.

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Soon enough, he gets up, gennntly lifts the sheets so he can swipe the chips off (still leaving a few remnants behind). Of course I’m laughing hysterically on the inside at this “deja vu”.

A few minutes later Harold decides to go get some yummy coffee from the coffee bar downstairs to go with our “Dulce du Leche” cheesecake (that I had bought earlier) for dessert.

While he was gone, it hit me. I thought, “How funny would it be to get some of those chip crumbs and sneak them ‘under’ the sheets on his side.” And so I did.

Later, when we were going to bed, he pulled back the covers and he could not believe that the chips had gotten all the way under the covers. He patiently cleaned it up again. I was dying on the inside trying to keep a straight face. He asked if I did it, and I denied the whole thing. This was fun! I tricked Harold! Yessss!

This morning he says with surprise, “You know, I thought that all of those chip crumbs might wake me up during the night, but I didn’t feel a thing!” I didn’t say a word.

A couple of hours later, I couldn’t stand it any longer. I made my confession. “Confession!” “What?” “Confession! I did it! I put the chips there! I did it and I can’t keep the secret anymore!” Harold laughs kind of like it’s funny and kind of like it’s not. [And, now he doesn’t trust me anymore.] 😦

But guess what woke ME up during the night?? CHIPS! On MY side of the bed!! (yawn)

The joke was on ME in the end!

My first and last “joke”. Ha. Ha.

“Heeeeere chippy chippy!” 🙂

 

 

A Typical Day with My Girls….

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Anytime you need to commiserate about kid stuff, I can definitely come up with one of our family’s attempts at a remedy.

One time, when our girls were about 15 and 13, I was in their room just letting them have it about the disaster that their room had become. I mean the clothes on the floor with those two was like 2 feet deep (literally). I could not stand it any longer. I went in their room ready to give my (almost) daily lecture. The more I looked around, the more upset I got.

messy room

I walked through the mess (stepping over everything under the sun) and finally made my way to the bathroom. I discovered things growing in there that I never even imagined existed. I was so so upset. It was at this point that I heard them snickering behind my back. Snickering? SNICKERING??? NOW I was LIVID!

I got louder and madder, and they LAUGHED louder and harder! In the middle of my rant, I shouted, “This is NOT ONE BIT FUNNY!! And if you know what’s good for you…..”, and about that time one of the girls (trying SO hard to stop herself from laughing) said, “Mom (pause) …..it’s just that…. (pause) the back of your dress is all stuck up inside of your panty hose!”

Then ALL 3 OF US were laughing (RFLOL) – out of control belly laughing……..WITH my underwear showing.

Humble pie anyone?

#totallyexposed #goodtimes

“The Disappearing Act”

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Shopping with Teenagers….

Wait until the day when you’ve been running non stop all day long, you can’t find the kids in the store because they think it’s cool (at that age) to disappear. And all you want to do is get home (usually because you’re starving and tired)!  Out of the blue, you finally get a glimpse of them about 9 checkouts down the row. Bingo!

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Suddenly, before you even get a chance think (mostly because you’re in a panic that you are about to lose them again), you hold up the box of Tampons high up in the air and holler to them, “ARE THESE THE ONES???”

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Disappearing act starts all over again.

“OCD” Mom

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Instantly Cured

Oh my. If you are OCD, and longing for the day when your child begins to “clean like you do”…..I hate to burst your bubble – but let me just go ahead and warn you now.

Back in the day, when I was a single mom of 3 children, I used to be like that (completely OCD about housecleaning/organizing, etc.), and it drove my kids crazy. It was to the point that we literally ended up bickering our way through several therapy sessions ($$$) over it.

Woman working from home, three kids playing in background

The children (all under 12) told the therapist how I was “driving them crazy” with constant housecleaning, and harassing them to do the same. After all, these little “apples” did fall from my tree!

Nevertheless, one day, my precious middle child was invited to be on the 6 o’clock news to be interviewed for getting a Big Sister with Big Brothers and Big Sisters of America. When the news anchor asked her what she likes to do for fun, THIS is what she told the entire viewing audience of Houston, Texas (in her sweetest most innocent little girl voice): “We don’t have a lot of things to do because we’re usually so busy cleaning house.” 😦

Surely, feeling like they had misunderstood her, they asked a SECOND time to clarify. And the second time, she said the exact same thing AGAIN!!!

I was INSTANTLY cured of MY problem :/

#hasseledatworkthenextday

Let’s Laugh

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Years ago, I was an Image Consultant for BeautiControl Cosmetics.  I would store some of my inventory under the bathroom sink.  From time to time, I would pull out a NEW lipstick that had little teeth marks in it, or the top was bitten off of it.

Lauren was my toddler (about 2 years old). Obviously, she was the one getting into the cabinet under the sink and playing with my new lipsticks.  I just never caught her in the act, so I couldn’t scold her.

One day, I went in the bathroom, and she was comfortably sitting on the floor with the cabinet door opened. As soon as she saw me, she smiled really big and held up a lipstick for me.  It was so stinkin’ funny, I couldn’t even get mad at her.  She had drawn bright red circles around her mouth. It was in her hair, down her arms, hands and everywhere!

She was SO proud of herself.  This picture reminded me of that day.

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When the Kids were Little – “Bobby Solves A Mystery”

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Bobby Solves A Mystery

Back in the late 80’s I was a single mom with 4 children. The oldest was 16 year old Nicole, then there was 11 year old Elizabeth, 9 year old Bobby, and my newborn at the time, Lauren.

Needless to say, my hands were full. – My hands, my lap, my brain, my feet, my back, EVERYTHING was FULL.  Most days, I was turning every which way but loose! And the children knew it too – the little boogers.

We lived in a small apartment at the time, and the grocery store was right behind the apartment within walking distance.  There were times when I was not able to run to the store for every little thing because of the baby and all of the commotion that goes along with that plus raising the other three.  So, I’d let the oldest child, Nicole, take her two younger siblings with her to pick up little odds and ends.

brach's pick a mix

Does anyone remember the Brach’s Candies that you could buy (by the pound) in the grocery store?  You could just walk up to the open bins, grab a handful of different candies, weigh them, and then bring them to the counter for check out?  Some of the bins even had a little metal box with a slit at the top so you could drop a nickel in if you just wanted one piece? Yes, you did have to pay for them.

One day, I began to notice empty candy wrappers around the house.  At first I didn’t think anything of it; who had time to think anyway?  But as time went by, I began to find more wrappers. I wondered, “Where is all of this coming from?”  I thought, “Could the kids be getting this candy at school or something?  Maybe from someone in the neighborhood?  They did have a few friends in our apartment complex. Maybe they were getting it from them?”  I knew that I had not bought any candy like that.

So one day I asked my oldest daughter, “Nik, do you know anything about this candy? I’m finding empty candy wrappers all over the house?”  She replied, “No mam!”  I asked my middle daughter, “Liz, I’ve been finding these candy wrappers all over the house, are these yours?’ “No mam.”  I ask Liz again, “Do you know where they come from?”  Liz said, “Nope.” I thought to myself, “Hmmm.”

So little Bobby comes home from school and I ask Bobby, “Bobby do these candies belong to you?” And in his little high pitched voice, he quite happily said, “Uh huh!”  I said, “Where did you get the money for these?” He replied, “Nikki said they were free!  She said that they were “samples”, and that the people at the store WANTED us to try them to see if we liked them!  We got some for her too!”

Case of the empty candy wrappers solved by my little genius, Bobby (from that day forward referred to as, “you little tattle tale!”).

The joys of motherhood 😉