MRI’s for DUMMIES

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My MRI Experience

Thank you all very much for your prayers and encouragement. During the 2 hours of lying flat on my back, only able to move my head, I desperately tried to think of things to do to make the time pass.

In my mind, among the different things I tried, I wrote a blog, I created a FB group page, I thought of names for the page, made up an entire Zumba routine to the 8 count of the MRI machine, I prayed for people I knew, I prayed for sleep (which never came), I imagined how good it would feel to get out in the heat to defrost myself from being in this meat locker, and I practiced relaxation breathing. It was SO stinkin’ cold in there I actually PRAYED FOR HOT FLASHES! And then I counted sheep.

I even laughed (all by myself) about the time I told my husband to count sheep one night when he was having trouble sleeping. He said he couldn’t do it. I asked why, and he said because he didn’t know what to do with the sheep once they got over the fence. I said, “What do you mean you don’t know what to do with them?” He said, “I don’t know, the sheep kept piling up on the other side and it became such a big mess that it was stressing me out”!

My sheep just go over. They don’t land. They just go over. That’s it. They just go over.

So back to the procedure.

  1. Usually I only need meds if they put my ‘whole’ body in “feet first” (no idea why), so I didn’t ask the doctor for anything.
  2. I didn’t know it was going to last for 2 hours until I got there and freaked.
  3. Not 1 blanket available for me – she “just sent them all off with laundry guy”. What??
  4. She offered “A” sheet. One sheet. And she didn’t even know what to do with THAT one. I ended up using 5 sheets (placed on me by my own self btw) and still froze.
  5. I asked for a bolster to put under my knees to take the pressure off of my back. Oops! No bolsters. She clumsily tried to improvise by using some cold square plastic things that she found on a shelf. She was having so much trouble trying to rig it up, I had to help her figure it out (along with folding my own sheets to support my back), while ON my back.
  6. Lying on my back for 2 hours was hurting so bad. Then when I had so so much trouble getting up afterward (and she full well saw (and heard) me struggling), she never offered to help me in any way. She said, “Be careful – you’re high up!” Oh, really?? Wow. Yeah. Thanks for letting me know.
  7. Then she says, “Did you sleep”? No. I cannot sleep to the sound of a jackhammer while I’m freezing to death, I have to pee, and my back feels like it’s breaking.

mri

TIPS for MRI of the feet (learned the hard way):

  1. Dress like you are going to visit North Pole, AK. You can always remove clothes if you have too much, but you can’t make more clothes appear out of nowhere if you’re cold.
  2. When you drive up to the place and there are no cars out front – LEAVE.
  3. When you get inside and there is only 1 person in the whole place (who doesn’t seem the least bit confident) LEAVE
  4. If you stayed anyway, and they offer you reading material for the procedure, and the magazines weigh a pound a piece, AND there’s no light to read by anyway, – DECLINE – what’s the point.
  5. Don’t look at the clock because every time you do it will STILL say 1:30.
  6. Bring a hairbrush. The only thing you can move during the procedure is your head, which will insure a “rats nest” bigger than anything you can ever imagine.
  7. Since the table is not even as wide as you are, you will definitely need to find a way to keep your arms from falling off the table. May I suggest tucking your thumbs under your butt – that works. Or, wear a belt and tuck your hands just inside. That works until your bladder gets full, then go back to thumbs under the butt.
  8. IF you have bobby pins in your hair, which will likely be lying on the table when you get up (from all the head turning), grab them as fast as you can, or they will magically fly through the air and attach themselves to the inside of the MRI machine! (I’m not kidding). When  you get your bobby pins OUT of the machine, DON’T set them down again because they WILL fly right back into the machine and reattach themselves to the wall yet again – probably the most interesting thing about the whole procedure.

Your welcome.